insert sarcasm here

I don't get many comments here which is fine with me because I stopped writing for comments long ago. I write somewhat anonymously because I hate all the drama associated with blogging. I consider this blog my space and I write for myself because it's what I love to do. I know of a couple of people who read this blog occasionally, although I suspect I have at least one follower from my old blogging days at aol who never comments but seems to check in on me a lot. I don't even mind that it might be someone I know who doesn't want me to know that they've found me as long as they leave me alone and don't start up drama. I've done the drama thing and don't want to go back there. I think most people come here accidentally, however, and never come back. I like it that way because I am not looking for an audience to love me or hate me. I just want to write.

My blog isn't a place I come to so that I can listen to a bunch of blowhards argue with me about what I write without knowing a thing about me. Because that's the thing about blogging--we show people what we want to show them about ourselves--at least that's how I blog. I show you a small part of myself and just trust me that you are not getting a full picture of me or my life. There is no way I can write it out for you, even if I wanted to. I will always be more and less than what you think I am.

So when I received this comment from "Christa" whose profile doesn't lead to anything but a private profile page, I was reminded again how much I despise most people in the blogging world because they tend to make false judgements about people they do not know at all. I've witnessed how hateful these self-important people can be when they comment at blogs where they disagree with what's written or how they perceive a blogger is living his/her life. They're like vultures enjoying a battered and bloody carcase on the side of the road. They're just despicable.

Here's Christa's comment:

Christa has left a new comment on your post "not a hero": Oh give me a break. Seriously, the "if they like their home country so much..." argument is one of the clearest signs of a bigot. Your kids are so lucky of all that you've taught them [insert sarcasm]. Thank God they're being exposed to a little more than the "Heavenly Father" BS you teach. Posted by Christa to Breathe Through It... at March 6, 2010 4:05 PM


Oh no, the bigot card was thrown out at me in an attempt to shut me up. She totally ignores the point that I make about the insanity of these radical, puke liberal professors LYING to their students and rewriting history by telling them that Mao is a hero, a visionary, a poet---instead of a cold blooded evil killer who murdered 70 plus million of his own people. Christa is just happy and relieved that my kid gets exposure to someone who lies about China and Mao instead of telling them the truth. We wouldn't want anyone to think badly of China now would we? That wouldn't be politically correct, would it ? We must make sure that we do not offend any minority because being politically correct is way more important than telling the truth. This is the exact sort of bullshit that is ruining our country. I'm going to call things as I see them and if radical pukes want to call me a bigot or think I'm a bigot, so be it. Radical professors who hate America and pine about the good old days in another country while smack talking America under the guise of educating our youth probably should go back to the land that they love because we don't need them here. We have enough Americans hating on our country as it is and striving their hardest to fundamentally change it into something else.

Christa ends with some nonsense about the"Heavenly father" BS that I teach my children. And this is where I am wondering if Christa is mistaking me for someone else because I have never mentioned religion here except in reference to my personal journey of moving away from organized religion because I do not believe it in anymore. My children were not raised in any religion and this is why I can't stand having some buffoon that doesn't know me from Adam (oh my, a religious reference!!!) coming to my space and making a comment based on nothing that is real. I don't need lectures from an anonymous asshat who doesn't leave a link to a blog she keeps so that I can go to her place and make sure she is pumping out material that suits my beliefs the way she came here to insist in a passive aggressive way that I should think and write things that are more to her liking. I feel really, really bad that I'm did not live up to Christa's blogging standards of political correctness (insert sarcasm!).

When I started this blog, I thought about turning the comments off but it's something you have to remember doing every time you post and I always forgot. I'm putting my comments on moderation so that I don't have to see comments here by people I wouldn't bother knowing in real life. Christa and her ilk are all for being tolerant until someone doesn't say or think just what she considers acceptable and then tolerance gets thrown out the window and the claws come out. She can start her own blog for that purpose. I'm not obligated to give her my space to climb up on a soap box and spew her crap.

Have the hot tamale train make a stop at my house to pick me up and take me far away---PLEASE

"It's just life. Just live it." ~The Quote Garden

It's been a long day. It started off early taking my husband to the airport. Thank goodness traffic wasn't too bad this morning. It's a short trip and he'll be home tomorrow night. He'll come home and ask me if I missed him and honestly, he's never gone long enough for that to happen so I usually tell him no.

I came home to the daily "car battles" that have been happening here and I've got to tell you, I've about had it with all of them. We're still 2 cars short(because did I tell you all that my son's transmission went on his trip home from college? because it did!!!) and so every day it's with this bickering and fighting over who gets what car. Apparently I missed an "almost physical fight" between my son and youngest daughter that my oldest daughter broke up. This is at 8 AM, mind you, and I don't wake up properly until after 10 AM which everyone knows.

So I come home to the aftermath of this drama and I'm not in any mood to be a referee anymore which is the role they always assign me. Then I have my son giving me a lecture about how I'm not parenting my youngest properly because she's a big mouth and doesn't back down! Huh? I finally slammed my bedroom door and locked it behind me because no one here can discuss things rationally without hitting below the belt. I don't know why my first response is to just run away from all of them, but there you have it. All I want to do is run away. I'm tired. I want them all to grow up and move the fuck out.

I'm sure I'll feel differently and better tomorrow but right now I'm pretty much over them.

~~~~~~~

I think today is the last day of NCLM. I was right on track until I went on vacation and I just haven't been able to catch up so I guess I failed. Sigh. I cannot lie, my intentions are usually always better than my actions. I typically have no time for people like that. I'm quite the hypocrite sometimes.

Anyhow, what I wanted to say about the whole NCLM thing is that even though I wasn't able to follow through on my commitment, I really feel as though I got a lot out of the whole experience and I'd like to thank the Stirrup-Queen for heading this thing up.

Blogging can be a little cliquish in my opinion. I'll take a peek at blogrolls and click on a link and an identical blogroll appears on the link I clicked. Sometimes it feels like once a group is established, they don't want anyone else to come in. Now I could just be projecting, but that's how it FEELS to me so maybe there's a little bit of truth in what I'm saying. It's like they all link to each other and talk about each other in posts and outsiders just don't stand a chance against all that chummy friendliness.

The whole thing annoys me and I've mostly been happy staying here by myself and avoiding that because I guess I'm just getting too old to play games that aren't fun. I don't want to be in any group just to exclude other people. That doesn't work for me. I want to like who I like. I want to not read blogs I don't like and not feel like I have to swoon over someone just because a bunch of people say how wonderful they are. In other words, I have a working brain and can make my own decisions about who and what I like to read.

But NCLM was different because it was people who wanted to participate and I have to say that I'm so thrilled to have found a number of really great blogs that I know I will follow as long as the authors are writing. It opened me up to commenting again and while I find the whole comment thing tiresome when it feels like an obligation, I'm going to be true to myself and only comment when I feel as though I have something to add.

I know I've gained more than I thought I would , more than I gave, really, and that was nice. That was awesome.