January is 31 days too long

I'm waiting for January to be over. I know. It's not like once February rushes in that things will magically change and life will be better. I just find January hard, have found it hard for years. It hasn't helped that I've been sick, and that the sun hasn't been shining as much. I was born to have the sun beating down on me, shining on me. I'm not sure of much, but I'm quite sure of that.

I've lived in both the north and the south so I know for a fact that I thrive better where there is lots of sun. I remember moving to the south and being amazed at all the sun I had missed all my life. When I woke up in the morning I couldn't believe it was sunny almost everyday (when I lived in Florida). I'd open the blinds and think, "It's sunny again?" It was like I had died and gone to heaven. I will always love Florida for the sun and for making me feel like I was on vacation every single day that I lived there.

I can't think of anything else to write that I haven't written before so I won't bore y'all or waste your time any further. I'm living. I'm alive. Life is good.

Wishing for everything, committing to nothing (Happy New Year)

"May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions." ~Joey Adams

I am trying to come up with a list of things that I want to do/accomplish in 2009 but I'd hate to post something that would leave concrete evidence of me failing. I'm more the type that keeps a mental list that can be easily erased, forgotten or revised at any time to suit my purposes. I am not ashamed to say that lists of things to do make me nervous. Whenever I do have the forethought to create one, I usually leave it behind me when I set off to do what needs to get done or I simply just lose it on purpose so I have a ready made excuse for coming up short.

I'm aiming for lots of happiness in 2009 for myself and for my loved ones. And good health, too. I want to read more, to never stop learning because I've found an idle mind breeds discontent. I'm hoping I can find a way to incorporate some of my dormant dreams into reality. I will need much courage for that, and so I'm aiming to reach deep down inside and find that, too, dust it off and use it. I want to remember to look at each day as the gift that it is and do things in the span of each day that will make me proud of how I am living my life. I want to make myself a priority, which I never do, but I think I deserve it now that my children are pretty much grown. I want to keep writing because it feels necessary for me to write things down, even if no one is reading--it's the part of me that says the most about me, even when I am guarded. Mostly, I just want to live another year so that I can come back here next year and wish for another.

Happy New Year!

It takes strength to live this way - My slice of life quotes

He said "you are the wife, you are the mother," and I told him that they were just roles I played, and he wanted to know what I meant by that and so I told him that I am more than the things I do for him and everyone else, and he still didn't get it because he didn't want to think about me being something more than what he's boxed me into being, and I told him it didn't matter because I would be more anyway.